Frog & Toads

This past week has been a rough week in regards to slimy, slithery, creepy, crawly creatures…

It first started at the beginning of the week, on Tuesday, when I walked out of the front door and was confronted by a green frog that attached himself to the glass of the front porch light. There was also a huge spider in the corner of the porch, who was sitting next to a super long, brown snake.

All. At. The. Same. Time.

I got rid of the snake, had J.D. take care of the spider and then ignored the green frog because he seemed pretty chill.

Fast forward to last night when I decided to stay up after everyone went to bed so I could finally get control of the mess in the garage.

At about 2:00 am, I started to hear a weird flapping noise at the garage door that I couldn’t place. I decided to pause my cleaning session to go around to the front door to take a peek, just in case it was some weird burgler or something. When I looked, it was two brown toads throwing their bodies against the garage door. I left them alone and went back inside but I felt uneasy…

I went back to the garage to finish up and not two minutes later, I saw a toad hopping up beside me. He must have been in the garage with me the entire time. After getting a super bad case of the heebie-jeebies, I set out to catch him with a bucket and a piece of spare cardboard from my recycling pile…

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As I was working on catching him, not one — but two more appeared. Ahhhhh!!!! I can’t even deal with this sort of terrorism.

Somehow I disassociated myself from the situation and managed to catch all three toads, transport them through the house and out the front door to humanely tossed them on the lawn while silently shrieking, because by this time it was at least 3:45 am and I didn’t want to wake the neighbors… And who do I see sitting next to the front patio? The two assholes who started this entire episode.

This morning, I was telling J.D. about my toad trapping fiasco and showing him the cleaned out garage and as I was picking up the last trash bag, another toad jumps out and I scream so loud that Bean starts crying. Ugh… Poor kid.

Anyway, I tried to look up reference pictures for y’all but when I started searching, I got so freaked out that I threw my phone and had to have Bean bring my phone to J.D. so he could clear my browser history so I wouldn’t have to look at them any more… Just imagine Keroppi as the green frog that attached himself to our front porch light and imagine a brown Keroppi as the brown toads that viciously attacked me. Use your imagination, people!

Featured Image: Image credit to Sanrio. Just to make things clear, Keroppi is not longer my favorite Sanrio character. He has been replaced by Badtz-Maru and Pochacco. But, I’m still fond of Arnold Lobel


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